Haircuts. How many haircuts have

August 23, 2002

Haircuts. How many haircuts have I had in my life? How many times have I shaved? How many times does one person wash a car? Some of these things come more easily to mind than others. I could probably count the number of hairstyle modifications I’ve been through (more than most) if I search back but the number of actual haircuts would be tougher. I think its about every four months. That’s how I do it. I cut it and let it go til its either freaking me out or is boring to look at. Its getting that way with shaving too. Its getting that way with just about everything. Start it, let it go and then screw it all up once it becomes something. . .or . . .start it, watch it and eventually grow tired of it. So many rash decisions are precipitated purely by boredom or discomfort. Boredom and alcohol are a pretty volatile combo. Small town crime sprees, misspelled tattoos, computer viruses and crazy new dances. The 80’s may have been the best historical example.
I have never really settled on a haircut. Maybe I’ve never been able to control my boredom reaction cycle in the interests of proper marketing. We have all learned that change is a brander’s nightmare. If I could just stick to one thing then it would be easier to sell all those buttons with my face on them. Every time I change it I help subvert anybody’s ability to burn my image into their memory banks. I have never entered the comfort zone that would allow me to stay in one hairy place. Some people stay with the haircut they had in high school. It reminds them of a time when everything was right and exciting for them. Maybe they actually were popular with girls at the time. I didn’t enjoy the social aspects of my teenage years enough to fall comfortably into a nice Port Moody mullet or stay with my pre-grunge unilength look. I have revisited that latter one a couple of times but never stayed too long. I feel it peaked with my “Little Mermaid” look from 1993 to 1994. My “shag” came and went a number of times. The “tennis ball” look has been pretty solid for me over the last few years. I predict “the Bob” cut of the early 90’s to be the next haircut up for popular ridicule. As a youngster I was a proponent of the brush cut far beyond its day in the sun. I liked the feel of it and I liked rubbing that stick of wax on my head. If you finished high school in the 80’s then chances are good you should be moving on to a different haircut by now.
By yesterday my hair had reached its high school grad photo length. It was three different bleached out and frazzled shades and I hadn’t shaved for a few days. I have also taken to wearing my slippers . . .all the time . . .everywhere. If the image grows to musky then I will add that I do keep myself clean. My motivation for today’s move back to the traditional “messy short” Craig was based mostly on discomfort rather than boredom. Its hot out. This, I felt, was a valid reason to hack it off. I am inadvertently moving into the “I have definitely grown tired of any ideas concerning imaging” look. This could be construed as having something to do with imaging. I assure you it is laziness in grooming and my subsequent reaction to my laziness that has been the essence of any style I convey. Style has nothing whatsoever to do with fashion but I adopt elements of the current fashion if I find them conveniently available on a rack that is within my grasp and close to the door of the mall I wish to get out of as soon as humanly possible. Boredom does not allow me to go to the same place and buy the same thing over and over. My loathing of shopping helps me make snap decisions in new situations. Some decisions I have regretted. Other decisions I just wish were never documented on film but I don’t regret them too much. Haven’t got used to this haircut yet.